Well it’s a brand new year. Time for a fresh start. Time to make new resolutions for change, improvement, ways to do things better.

Maybe this year though, maybe all I really want is for my husband to be healthy again. We’re heading into a new chapter in the attempt to figure out what’s wrong with him and it’s a scary direction. Because it means if they’ve missed what they now think it might be, he’s gone undiagnosed for a year. Likely beyond treatable.

And for all the bitching I’ve done about him here over the years, and god knows I’ve done some complaining, I love that man to the very depths of my soul. The thought of losing him causes a panic in me like nothing I’ve ever felt before.

So for this new year sure I want to be a better mom, lose 50 pounds, find satisfaction in a career and win a million dollars - but most of all I want my husband to be healthy and well so next year at this time - he’s right by my side ringing the new year in with me again.